Category — After the Pause

All last week I was suffering from PCSD. That’s Pre Colonoscopy Stress Disorder.

It’s recommended that at age 50 all of us get a colonoscopy, to screen for colon cancer. In the abstract, it seems like a no brainer. Get checked out and either get a clean bill of health or catch disease early so it can be treated. End of story.

But when that fifth decade arrives, the abstract becomes concrete. That initial screening exam seems less like a great idea and more like a trip to Procrasti-Nation is needed. I thought about it when I turned 50, considered it a bit more seriously at age 51, blew it off at age 52, felt a little guilty at 53, and finally, at age 54, scheduled the damn thing.

Essentially, there were two parts of this procedure I wasn’t looking forward to. And no. One of them was not the tube shoved miles up my nether zones. Oddly enough, that didn’t bother me too much. Especially knowing I wouldn’t be awake for the event.

What bothered me was the prep and the anesthesia. First, I worried about the prep. To prepare for the flexible tube-snake to see and photograph your colon, you are required to drink a gallon of thick, salty sludge with the ridiculously inappropriate name of GoLytely. Because you don’t. Go Lytely. No, you go as hard as it is possible to go without actually turning your large intestine inside out and dragging it over your body like a chrysalis. I kid you not.

You drink the first half gallon starting at 4:00 pm the day prior to the exam – downing 8 ounces every 10 minutes. Then you pull up stakes and live in the bathroom for the next five hours.
Exhausted, you crawl to bed praying that Mom Nature won’t call you any more that night. You have no more left to give.

At 6:00 am, after flinging your abusive alarm across the room, you start the second half gallon, 8 oz every 10 minutes, and again take up residence in the bathroom.

The prep was as bad as I hoped it wouldn’t be. However, I was grateful that I didn’t have to be at the hospital until 11:00 am for obvious reasons.

Once in the special procedures room, a nurse started my IV, dressed me in a fetching open back frock, and hooked me up to monitors. No problem. Now all I had to do was wait. And fret. About the anesthesia.

Now the anesthesia for a colonoscopy is really called conscious sedation. Which means while you have no awareness or memory of the procedure (many mahalos for that), you are actually responsive and in what is called a twilight sleep. It’s short acting and you wake and leave shortly after the procedure.

Unfortunately, I am a bit of a control freak, so even a nice “twilight sleep” sounds like a nightmare to me. However, the alternative of being awake and aware of the tube-snake seemed much worse, so I was down for the full meal deal.

As they rolled me into the procedure room, I noticed my heart rate and blood pressure climbing. It’ll do that when you fret. A needle went into my IV and the next thing I knew was I was getting dressed, joking with the doctor and nurses, and in a very mellow mood. Especially after getting the clean bill of health. Didn’t remember a thing. Went home and let Dewitt wait on me.

So was it worth it? You bet! Wasted a lot of time worrying and fretting, though.

If you have yet to have your first colonoscopy, I have just two other bits of info that might help. First, make sure you have a warm robe and/or a space heater in the bathroom when you drink the prep. My girlfriend, Gena, told me that I’d feel chilled when I drank the GoLytely (because it’s refrigerated and diet is only clear liquids from breakfast on, etc.) Keeping warm definitely ups the comfort factor. (I was cold and I live in the tropics!)

Also, eat yogurt for a few days after the procedure. I was at my chiropractor’s office a couple days after my procedure and mentioned to him that it was really easy, but that I was feeling kind of crappy (no pun intended) in my lower intestinal area. “Are you eating yogurt?” he asked. Dumbstruck, I looked at him. Why hadn’t I thought of that? I had just cleaned out every single cell of normal bacteria out of my colon. Of course I needed some help getting back to normal. Duh!

Sure enough, a couple servings of yogurt and I was feeling perky again. So don’t wait, goddesses. Put on those big girl panties and schedule your colonoscopy. It’s one of those things that is so much easier in hindsight (pun intended) that you wonder why you waited so long to do it.

(For the best ever colonoscopy story, read Dave Barry’s essay: A journey into my colon — and yours.)

“I LIKE it but I just don’t know if it’s my PASSION.”  Finding a life’s passion was a theme for some of our early (and recent) discussions at the Venus meetings. Our dissections of this topic have had an urgency to them. After all, we are now officially in the second half of our lives and we don’t want to waste a single second. We spent a lot of time in the first half working and building career and family life.  Now we want to “find our passion.”

I’ve been musing more about this lately.  And it seems to me, we don’t need to find our passion, necessarily.  Passion sounds huge, momentous, important and weighty.  We had questions galore about the passion quest: Where do we look for it? How do we know when we’ve found it? How much of a commitment do we make to it.

A passion should by definition be GRAND.  Or should it?

What if we just had a lot of little passions, small pastimes we enjoyed and delighted in like gardening, biking, and wine-tasting (in Beej’s case) or photography, hula, and golf in mine. More like passionettes. That would sure take the pressure off – finding the ONE special thing that we not only are in LOVE with (read passionate about) but are willing to abandon ourselves to and actually become good at doing or performing. How about we just fall in like (and out if that’s how it works.)

If we were to allow ourselves full access to our delight in our small “likes” rather than that one great LOVE or passion, might we then be able to relax into pure joy and contentment? And in so doing, discover that our real passion is LIFE?

I’m not sure, but I feel so much more comfortable and “full” when I look at my passionettes in this way.  I’ll likely never be a good golfer, but I really like it. I don’t want to golf every day or obsess about my score.  I just want to get outside, breathe fresh air, hit some pretty shots and maybe break 100 now and again.

I love hula – it’s my spiritual practice as well as a dance. And a crossroads has opened before me – do I want to go further and become a teacher? And the answer would likely be yes if it was my ONE PASSION. If I’m honest with myself, I’d have to say it is not. I can go to church and worship without needing to become a minister.

This past week, I’ve been indulging in my photography passionette.  Jack Davis (of the Photoshop WOW books) taught a class here on Moloka`i, Hawai`i with my handsome hubby Dewitt Jones. I’ve been reveling in taking photos with no real goal or endpoint in mind -  just pure pleasure

In fact, now that I’m no longer looking at photography as something “serious” or my passion, I’m experiencing way more fun and freedom. And my favorite camera?  My iPhone – because with all the cool apps, I can shoot, collage, and push the creative envelope to my heart’s content, no holds barred. (Check out my Digital Diva and Digital Diva / Digital Dude iPhone art sites.)

So I’ve given up looking to find my PASSION.  When I have family, good friends, and my small but vibrant passionettes, nothing is missing.  Nothing at all.

“If I knew then what I know now……” my elders often said when I was growing up. They never finished the sentence that I can remember, but nodded wisely at one another as if the continuation of the thought were telepathically understood. That partial sentence makes a lot more sense to me now and the goddesses have spent a fair amount of time reflecting on this look back.

As it turns out, we don’t have regrets exactly, but there are some situations looking back where we wish we could have a do-over. From our current perspective, we spent far too much time worrying, obsessing, perfecting, pushing, fearing, and procrastinating. We are sure we’d have created a different experience if we’d only known then what we know now.

The Venuses all wished they’d been freer and taken more chances. Looking back, we’d like to have experimented more, traveled more, enjoyed ourselves more.

In no particular order we wish we had danced, written, read, and made art. Playing an instrument, living abroad, learning a language, yoga and laughter also topped our do-over list as did spending time with family. We’d camp, hike, do yoga, and spent more quiet time without having to answer to anyone.

We wish we’d done a long river trip and joined the Peace Corps. Some of us wished we had been more active politically and taken strong stands when we felt so moved.

A universal wish was that we would have taken better care of our own needs. We would have liked to have been more open and kept the wide eyed wonder of youth. Trusting our intuition and judgment were options we wish we’d exercised.

We would have liked to try more time alone when we were younger, to get acquainted with ourselves before the demands of work and family overtook us.

Given what we know now, we would also choose to look at alternative ways of living, take time to develop our spiritual life, and “listen to the whispers.”

Our do-over would definitely include less cleaning, gossiping, and procrastinating. We would wish to be less controlling and critical. We wouldn’t neglect our own needs, we’d blame less and celebrate more, and we wouldn’t worry so much about appearances. We’d happily give up trying to do it all and we’d joyfully jettison the roles of victim and martyr.

Given the choice to go back and relive the past, we’d be bold, adventurous, loving, fearless, and balanced.

Luckily, the second half of life still awaits us – there may be time yet to realize our dreams. Instead of a do-over, we may be ready for a go ahead!

(Material partially adapted from my book “The Big M”. Click on the link below to buy the book – proceeds help support this website – thanks for your support!)

Buy The Big M

Jimmy Buffett sings “I just want to live happily ever after…..every now and then.” And we can create time to be Queen for a day every now and then, if not everyday. As promised, I’m bringing us all some help in doing this.

One of our very own Venuses, Karen Leland, has just released a fabulous new book on Time Management. (Co-authored with her business partner Keith Bailey.) In a recent interview, I asked her for a few of her tips on Time Management for Menopause Goddesses.

How can the working Menopause Goddess keep her work-life balance?

“I think the key for working Menopause Goddesses is to discover what their deepest contribution and passion is and to integrate that into their lives. For some, they are lucky enough to have that be what they do for a living. For others, they need to make a concerted effort to carve out time to practice their passion.

I find, as do many of the working Menopause Goddesses I talk to, that we have to protect the time we spend on our heart’s greatest passion and not let the continuous demand of the daily to-do list keep us from expressing our greatest creativity or fulfillment.”

What are the biggest challenges the working Menopause Goddess faces in having a balanced life?

“One of the biggest challenges we working goddesses are facing – especially in this economy – is that many of us have to keep working to earn a living, Even when at this time in our lives some of us would rather pursue other, more creative outlets. I find that I don’t have the same drive I used to when I was in my 20′s and 30′s. My priorities have really changed, so creating a balanced life, means not sacrificing my true heart’s calling just to earn a living.

For many Menopause Goddesses this means adjusting their lifestyle so they can still work, but not so intensely.”

What five small things can a goddess do to increase her work-life balance?

“In doing the research for my latest book “Time Management In An Instant”, I spoke to a lot of psychologists and sociologists who were examining the nature of how we work today. A few things become abundantly clear including:

1. Each day, determine the 3 things you must do, 2 things you want to do and 1 thing that will relieve some pressure if you do it. By doing this, you avoid simply doing the stuff that is ‘crisis’ oriented.

2. Don’t do email or social media first thing in the morning. It’s a black hole that can suck you in for hours and hours. Do your exercise, meditation etc. to set yourself up for the day.

3. Use time planning to block off specific days and times in your calendar when you are going to work on your passions and most important commitments. Rather than leave them to chance, schedule them.

4. Make dates with girlfriends to go for a walk, for coffee, out to lunch, see a movie etc. If you make a date, you are less likely to break it and it forces you to get some time away from working or producing.

5. Limit your goals. It’s always tempting at the beginning of the year to sit down and come up with a laundry list of goals to achieve, in a wide variety of areas. But really, most people can only focus on at most 3 goals at a time. By limiting your goals and really focusing on the most important 2 or 3 the chances of them happening are greatly increased.”

How do you keep your sense of work-life balance?

“Well, for me things like art, being in nature and personal writing, are my lifelines. I need to be doing something artistic or I’m just not a happy person to be living with.

I’ve worked my schedule out so that I work longer days, 4 days a week, but can take Fridays off. This is prime time for me to go for a walk with a friend, do photography, paint, write a personal essay etc… It really helps me to stay in balance and get a perspective when I do this.”

Do you feel that the onset of Menopause affects work-life balance?

“For me it has greatly affected it. I am still ambitious, I still have goals, I still enjoy working, but something has changed. I really don’t want to work with the same level of intensity I used to. As one of my Menopause Goddess friends said ‘our bodies just are not supposed to work that hard at this time in our lives.’ I think that is true. I have a much greater interest in slowing down reflecting, taking time to enjoy life than I did.”

Buy a copy of Time Management In An Instant the week of July 20th and receive a free license to view the Essential Email online course. To buy the book and claim your bonus, or just to buy the book go to: http://www.quality-service.com/timemanagementinaninstant

Karen Leland and Keith Bailey are the bestselling authors of six books including Time Management In An Instant: 60 Ways to Make the Most of Your Day. They are the co-founders of Sterling Consulting Group, which helps organizations and individuals learn how to fight distraction and find their focus in a wired world. For more information please contact: kleland@scgtraining.com

Remember that old sixties television show "Queen For A Day"? Women competed to win the title along with roses and a grand prize such as a washer and dryer. Those grand prizes would be downright insulting to us daughters of the women’s lib movement. Give me a spa weekend or a fabulous dinner out, but DO NOT give me an appliance or housework aid. Sheesh.

I do know now what it is like to truly be "Queen For A Day". I went camping for a week in the High Sierra with my hubby Dewitt and dear friends, Don and Theresa Souers. On my birthday, we climbed up to this incredible lake.

Stunned into breathlessness by equal parts vista and oxygen molecule deprivation, I stood there just enjoying being Queen for the Day. I reveled in the best life has to offer: natural beauty, clear air, clean water (okay,we filtered it just in case, but you get the drift), good friends who know when to talk and when to be silent, and TIME.

Time. That glorious commodity that we were rich in as children. Days when we whined that there was nothing to do. And here we were revisiting such a day. A day without plans, agenda, or focus. It lasted soooooooooooo long. Hiking, photographing, junk food snacking, napping, reading, writing, more photographing, and spaghetti for dinner. Mmmmmmmm.

"What shall we do now?" we asked at intervals throughout the day. So many possibilities permeating that question. Such bounty and perfection. We sent ourselves outside to play, as if parenting ourselves.

Like kids, we barely combed our hair before throwing on mismatched clothes and jumping into playtime. We got scraped, muddy, and mosquito bit. We played in the water and sunned on the rocks. We lay down in a meadow, discovering shooting stars and Indian paintbrush as if for the first time.

We saw lynx tracks, marveled at the jewel toned flank of a golden trout, daydreamed as clouds drifted across a cerulean sky. This is what we most want: Time. Unstructured. Open. Free.

We’re all royalty when we take the time to look and enjoy our earthly "castles" – whether we are in the High Sierra, a local park or conservatory, or our own back yard. All we need is to STOP and enjoy. And if it is hard to find the time? If one actually feels they need to absent themselves as we just did to find that time? Well, on Wednesday (two days from now) one of our very own Venuses will share tips right here on Menopause Goddess Blog from her new book on time management. So we can all be "Queen For A Day."

Menopause should more accurately be called menohalt, as reader Jackie M points out. I wonder sometimes about the scientists or health professionals that named it – were they overly optimistic? Confused? Clueless? Where actually is the PAUSE in menopause?

I think I may have figured it out. The Pause might be a pause for reflection. We can’t remember anything, can’t function as we used to, are clueless and confused ourselves. We reevaluate everything. We pause to ask ourselves who we are. We look back to who we’ve been up until the Big M. We look ahead to the woman we might become.

We pause to ask what WE want, rather than what does our family, our work, our world want from us. We cease going on automatic and examine our life from the sides, the bottom, the soft juicy core.

The Big M ushers in a host of other m’s, not the least of which is mortality. A pretty big M in its own right, mortality reminds us that this ride is not forever, so we had better choose our manner of conveyance and pay attention to the journey.

We pause to ponder what we might be when we grow up. We pause to consider what we might wish to leave behind when we shuffle off this mortal slinky. Mostly, we pause to appreciate, to savor flowers and love and blue sky and books and girlfriends.

I recently discovered Vibrant Nation, a website for women over fifty, when they posted an article about my book "The Big M". I liked the site and its conversations. so I joined. When I filled out the personal info page with bio and the usual stats, I came to a box that asked me to send a postcard to my younger self.

I was delighted and intrigued. What would I say to her/me if I could? Besides love your body because it changes, don’t sweat the small stuff, clean less and play more, work and success are okay, but love and gratitude make for a meaningful life. Stuff like that.

In the end, I simply wrote this:

Dear Me,

It’s all worth it – it only gets better. I’ll be (am) glad when you are here.

All my best,

Me

What would YOU write to your younger self? Let me know and maybe we’ll be able to pass on our notes to our daughters and the young goddesses in training. Pause, reflect, and send that virtual postcard to the sweet, young you from the wiser, vibrant woman you’ve become. Let’s really put the PAUSE in menopause.

(photo for this posting by my handsome hubby, Dewitt Jones)

There are definitely days that I’d like to take a break from The Big M. Even when I’m not particularly hot, sweaty, cranky, or weepy, most of the time it feels like Menopause has taken over my life.

Okay, okay, I know that the goddesses and I chose this path – we wanted to make sure that no other women had to suffer the uncertainty and panic we went through. If nothing else, we wanted our sister goddesses to travel the journeys through menopause, and more important, the second half of life with one another. And we love this job. But there comes a time when a goddess has just got to take a break.

In that spirit, I am declaring a menopause break for the solstice. On June 21, I’m going to forget about hormones, creams, night sweats, mood swings, and brain fog. I’m going to spend the day being young!

Of course, my laugh lines won’t disappear. My age spots and wattle will still be there. My low-flying tatas will still struggle mightily with gravity (and lose) But just for the day, I’m not going to notice them. (Or care if anyone else does.)

I’m a big fan of the best of second childhood; things like openness and wonder, celebration and play, romps and naps. I’m going to start my second childhood on my Menopause Break Day in earnest by doing whatever frivolous things catch my fancy.

I might plunge into Photoshop and play with my photos. I might sit on the porch and read a novel. I might just zone out and watch the points of light on the water. I will most certainly eat chocolate!

Join me! Let’s play hooky from the Big M and celebrate thinking, feeling, and believing young. Pick a day, doesn’t have to be the solstice (because Father’s Day may not be the easiest day to take off). Who knows, our Menopause Break might become a habit. Second childhood is just around the corner, let’s start practicing now!

When Karen Leland first approached me about a Huffington Post piece on The Big M, she asked a series of questions. She’s also the Life-Balance Examiner for Examiner.com, so her first question was appropriately "How do peri-menopause and menopause affect a woman’s sense of balance in her life?" I answered her this way.

"A woman’s sense of balance is affected completely. Totally. Utterly. If a woman has managed to attain a certain level of balance in her life prior to these transitions, it will astonish her how completely "unbalanced" she will suddenly feel with the advent of the Big M.

The worst of it is not knowing what to expect or what is happening. Time and again, women will say to me "I thought I was going crazy."

There is good news, however, and HOPE. First, the worst of it is temporary. A goddess may be in for a tough year or two and things never completely return to our Pre-M state, but the ups and downs even out and balance is again attainable.

And, if we are prepared for this momentous transition, if we know what to expect, and that it’s temporary, we can handle it. After all, we’re women! We have reservoirs of strength. We give birth, for crying out loud!

And it may turn out that we give birth again, to a new self."

Ultimately, she pulled from my other answers specifics for a top 10 list of tips for becoming a menopausal goddess. The final tip addressed the "brain fog" aspect of the Big M. It was to be gentle with yourself when you put the mail into the refrigerator. When I gave that answer, I felt very balanced and sure that I was speaking with the voice of crone wisdom.

Alas, in a bizarre life imitating art moment, I was able to test this tip for myself today. I lost, or more likely misplaced, my checkbook. After calmly looking in all the usual places, (purse, check drawer, under the seats of the cars) I demanded that my husband join the search and/or tell me what he’d done with it. He hadn’t used it, but jumped into the fray.

Ordinarily he is the creative, right brained partner and often misplaces things in plain site. At these times I urge him not to worry, to be calm, to stop looking and the missing item will turn up. In an irritating role reversal, this time, he invoked the calm voice of reason, while I was having a panic-driven meltdown, tearing through the entire house looking EVERYWHERE for the motherloving CHECKBOOK! Which I still haven’t found! And yes, I even checked the fridge. Note to self: refrain from being logical, voice of reason when next Dewitt has hissy fit over a misplaced object.

So an amendment to that final tip: Be gentle with yourself when you can’t be gentle with yourself, because your freaking brain went on the fritz again. Just when you thought you had it all together.

I finished my interview with Karen, telling her that I believe that Menopause is a wake-up call. It starts out as a horror story, but with the support of other women, it can turn into a most amazing coming-of-age story One of the worst journeys you never wanted to take might morph into the best trip you’ve ever been forced to endure. I still believe this, even in unbalanced moments such as this one. Menopause. It truly can herald the best part of our lives. (But it’ll really piss us off first.)

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/karen-leland/how-to-be-a-menopause-god_b_183990.html

In Hawai`i, we have a saying. "A`a i ka hula." It means Dare to Dance. And it isn’t simply an admonishment for shy hula dancers. It’s a call to action, a call to boldly LIVE your life. As a followup to the blog entry of February 19th on doing what you love so that the riches will follow, I’m going to spotlight one bold and amazing goddess who IS daring to dance.

Teri did not give up her day job to follow her dream of a bookstore/gift shop where people could meet for coffee, spontaneous hula, cultural classes, and all manner of gathering and sharing. Her day job gave her up over a year ago and she revisited her dream. Was it possible? Could she do it? In this economy?

Yet, if not now, when? Like the woman who planted daffodils one bulb at a time, Teri took one baby step at a time. Developing a business plan, applying for loans, finding a space, painting, hammering, and filling shelves. With the help of a small community of women, Kalele Bookstore and Divine Expressions opened in Kaunakakai, Moloka`i the day after Teri’s fiftieth birthday.

Teri is a living embodiment of the aloha spirit. Born and raised in Hawai`i, her welcoming, nurturing presence was previously exhibited in service of some luxury hotel. Now she’ll be putting those gifts to work in support of her own dream. Exhilarating, scary, joyful, and okay, I’ll say it, daring. Will Kalele Bookstore and Divine Expressions be successful? It already is! Not only because we women are flocking to her story for coffee, a respite, or a conversation. It’s a success because Teri is doing what we all need to do at this time of our lives: daring to dance.

One of my blogger friends, Kat, sent me this wonderful message. Like me, she doesn’t usually forward email missives, but this one moved her enough to pass it on. I don’t know who wrote it or where it originated, but it is a great message. And it speaks so eloquently to each of us menopausal goddesses, as we contemplate and move forward in the Second Act of our lives.

"The Daffodil Principle"

"Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, ‘Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over.’ I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake Arrowhead . ‘I will come next Tuesday’, I promised a little reluctantly on her third call.

Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and reluctantly I drove there. When I finally walked into Carolyn’s house, I was welcomed by the joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my grandchildren.

‘Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!’

My daughter smiled calmly and said, ‘ We drive in this all the time, Mother.’

‘Well, you won’t get me back on the road until it clears, and then I’m heading for home!’ I assured her.
‘But first we’re going to see the daffodils. It’s just a few blocks,’ Carolyn said. ‘I’ll drive. I’m used to this.’

‘Carolyn,’ I said sternly, ‘Please turn around.’

‘It’s all right, Mother, I promise.You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience.’

After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand lettered sign with an arrow that read, ‘Daffodil Garden.’

We got out of the car, each took a child’s hand, and I followed Carolyn down the path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight.

It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it over the mountain peak and its surrounding slopes. The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patterns, great ribbons and swaths of deep orange, creamy white, lemon yellow, salmon pink, saffron and butter yellow. Each different-colored variety was planted in large groups so that it swirled and flowed like its own river with its own unique hue. There were five acres of flowers.

‘Who did this?’ I asked Carolyn.

‘Just one woman,’ Carolyn answered. ‘She lives on the property. That’s her home.’ Carolyn pointed to a well-kept A-frame house, small and modestly sitting in the midst of all that glory. We walked up to the house.

On the patio, we saw a poster. ‘Answers to the Questions I Know You Are Asking’, was the headline.

The first answer was a simple one. ’50,000 bulbs,’ it read.

The second answer was, ‘One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and one brain.’

The third answer was, ‘Began in 1958.’

For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun, one bulb at a time, to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountaintop. Planting one bulb at a time, year after year, this unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived.

One day at a time, she had created something of extraordinary magnificence, beauty, and inspiration. The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration.

That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time, often just one baby-step at a time and learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time. When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We can change the world

‘It makes me sad in a way,’ I admitted to Carolyn. ‘ What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty five or forty years ago and had worked away at it ‘one bulb at a time’ through all those years? ‘Just think what I might have been able to achieve!’

My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way. ‘Start tomorrow,’ she said.

She was right. It’s so pointless to think of the lost hours of yesterdays. The way to make learning a lesson of celebration instead of a cause for regret is to only ask, ‘How can I put this to use today?’

Use the Daffodil Principle. Stop waiting…..

Until your car or home is paid off
Until you get a new car or home
Until your kids leave the house
Until you go back to school
Until you finish school
Until you clean the house
Until you organize the garage
Until you clean off your desk
Until you lose 10 lbs.
Until you gain 10 lbs.
Until you get married
Until you get a divorce
Until you have kids
Until the kids go to school
Until you retire
Until summer
Until spring
Until winter
Until fall
Until you die…

There is no better time than right now to be happy. Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
So work like you don’t need money. Love like you’ve never been hurt, and dance like no one’s watching.

If you want to brighten someone’s day, pass this on to someone special. I just did!

Wishing you a beautiful, daffodil day!

Don’t be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin."

Marsha Sinetar wrote a book many years ago called "Do What You Love, The Money Will Follow". Naturally, it was a best seller. But the title was chosen by the publisher. The title she wanted was "Do What You Love, The Riches Will Follow". And riches may or may not be money. In fact, for most of the people she interviewed in the book, they didn’t give up their day job. Yet they identified themselves by their avocation, even when it made no money, received no distribution, garnered no external acclaim.

Let’s face it, we need to do what we love right now. We don’t have unlimited time on this planet. We can’t wait for retirement – given the state of the economy, the Golden years will likely still be working years for many of us. We can take small sacred steps to our secret desire, our most heartfelt dream. Write that cookbook, paint those watercolors, plant that garden, sing that song, read those stacks of books. Do what you love NOW and the riches will be present right away – in the process as much as the outcome.

To visit www.hyggedigter.blogspot.com”>Kat’s blogs, go click here.

and www.cultclipsgenx.blogspot.com

Marsha Sinetar’s book is still in print - check it out on Amazon.com.