Menopause – "Men on Pause" Bill Maher calls it. and while that’s not exactly true – well, it’s not exactly not true.
What I’m talking about here is Sex. I like Sex. A lot. I enjoy it, I adore my husband, sex has health benefits up the kazoo, and so on. But here’s the rub. Though I like it a lot and want to continue doing it as long as I have a skeleton covered by skin, I don’t want to do it as much as I used to. I’m no longer consumed by it.
What I’m saying is – my husband who has always been interested in sex, is even more interested now. And I gotta say, much as I love it, it feels oftentimes like I’m being fed before I have a chance to get hungry.
Add to that my husband’s newfound sensitivity. He wants to do it AND he wants to talk about it, analyze it, improve upon it, compare and contrast it. I need to get some rest!
Which brings us to Sleep vs INSOMNIA
Sleep is big for menopausal goddesses. Sleep is the new sex. We sigh with the unreserved lust previously accorded a nice ass in tight jeans when contemplating 800 thread count sheets, or a new firmer mattress with a pillow top. We used to moan in ecstasy at the thought of well……moaning in ecstasy. Now we catch our breath with desire at the thought of down comforters in silky duvet covers. Or chocolate. Chocolate always comes up when speaking of desire. Make no mistake, we are still interested in going to bed – only now we really want to sleep!
(Adapted from our upcoming book Venus Comes Of Age: The Wit and Wisdom of Menopausal Goddesses.)
Hot flashes have made us into feverish children: hot, cranky, irritable, and just plain pissed off.
Hey Honey –
Here I sit, wet, soaking cat on my lap, drinking green tea (not time for coffee yet which I know you absolutely cannot relate to and were you to be denied your morning carafe, a meltdown of molten-lava magnitude would surely flow, and BTW, I love that about you!), and just read your blog. I laughed out loud at this still much-too early morning hour at the above sentence. So that explains my recent barrage of opinionated and heated outbursts on just about everything. And yet, believe it or not, at 55 years young, I am still having regular periods. I have noticed getting a wee bit crankier than normal. I shall email this to my kids and husband so that they have a clue as to what I'm about. Just can't imagine when the real deal hits.
As for sex, well, I think because we're working so much and rarely have proper down time, it's taken a back seat. We're off on vacation tomorrow, so perhaps that will give us the much-needed rest we both need for some great lovin. Oprah had a show on this week about sex in your 60's and how that's the best time. I thought to myself, "Well, hot damn! The good times are ahead!"
I hope all is well with you and your sweetie and that wherever you might be, you're smiling, drinking coffee, and having great sleep in those 800-thread count sheets and pillow top mattresses. If I had any of those, I'd never leave the bed!
That is so funny and so true. My partner is out of town for two weeks and I am really enjoying sleeping!!!!
Diane
It's a shame you don't live right next door… we think SO MUCH alike. Sleep (if I could find it) could definitely be the new sex.
Hearing I’m not alone with these thoughts feels just wonderful. As wonderful as climbing between those newly changed sheets, stretching my toes further and further, chasing the cool, uncharted spots, Add a nice breeze coming through the windows, and oh baby I’m out. How can sex possibly top that? – Beah – bitterbuthappy.wordpress.com