Whether it’s a spa day or reading or journaling or watching your fave old movies or making art – regular play dates ought to be part of our second adulthood. We need to recapture childlike joy and immerse ourselves wholeheartedly in unstructured time.
In our feverish scheduling, it’s time to block out playdates (even whole play days) for menopause Goddesses.
It can be hard to get started – dieseling is what my hubby calls it. I start to do something just for me, but then jump up and try to accomplish, to cross a few more tasks off the list, to have something to show for my day.
Puttering around the house is enjoyable in its own way, as is getting a jumpstart on chores and the work week. But we can get lost in the laundry, cleaning out a closet, organizing, reports.
A Playdate is time just for me. And you. I love playdates with girlfriends too, but there should be just YOU time, where there is no need to adapt yourself to anyone else’s wants, needs, desires, or conversation. In fact, quiet is one of the most nourishing parts of my play days.
So, after a wonderful week of photographic seminaring here on Moloka`i, Dewitt took off for a gallery opening featuring his work on Maui. Though work has piled up and I felt behind, for my own sanity and serenity, I scheduled a Play Day.
Here’s how it went:
There was the usual dieseling: Changed the bedsheets and piled the old ones by the door to go out to wash.
Forgot sheets – . Organized my desk. Cleaned cat box. Sat down to read and saw sheets. Got up again and put them in wash and put wet towels knotted up in washer into dryer.
Answered phone, lost track of what I was doing: oh yeah, reading. Wait, got to jot down idea for blog. Played another move on Facebook Scrabble with a friend.
Started to read menopause research study in Menopause journal – remembered how much I hate medicalese speak. Put magazine down.
Made coffee – uh oh, breakfast dishes still in sink. Washed them. Poured cup of coffee and sat back down to re-read favorite book “Sisters of the Dream” by Mary Sojourner. A novel about the mystery and magic of sisterhood across time and culture. (out of print, but it’s possible to find a copy through a used bookstore.)
Some stories are food and this is one of them for me and Theresa-Venus, too. 40 minutes of blissful journeying, .then interrupted by chatty cat demanding affection – (cats think play days are all about them.)
More reading with cat on lap. Lunch.
Worked on painting technique on photographs using Photoshop. One success, one maybe, one failure but I learned something so can try it again and get it right.
Long walk, showered off the sweat. Finished and won Scrabble game online. Poured glass of wine and watched the sunset.
A perfect play day. A perfect day. I’m filled up again. Tomorrow I can work, refreshed and renewed, excited even.
What would you do with a play day? Or a few hours playdate? And isn’t it about time to schedule one? Share your “perfect day” with us – we might get some ideas for our own future play dates.
BTW, the photo painting that worked is the one of the butterfly above this post.
(For more wit and wisdom from our community of Menopause Goddesses, click here to purchase your copy of “The Big M” – your personal survival and thrival guide for the menopause transition.)
I can spend the whole day reading a good book. If I can be outside great but here in the Midwest during November that’s iffy. I agree with you about taking time just for you no friends or partners just you.
Ah, a blissful play day with self. No phones, no tv news – that would be a start. The perfect day would start with a pre-dawn cup of coffee and then settle into watch the sunrise light up Mt. Tallac. Reading a great mystery for about an hour (or so) and then taking a walk. After the walk, I would read some more, play with some photography and experiment with printing some images on a printer I don’t own yet (better yet, if we are fantasizing, I would be printing on the printer I just won in a contest for the best of something), read some more, pour a glass of wine and settle back to relax while my personal manicurist gives me a pedicure and manicure, finish the mystery (which had an ending I never saw coming) and then settle onto the massage table as my personal massage therapist prepares to take me to another dimension for the next two hours. One more glass of wine while taking in an old movie and then off to bed. Geez, just writing this makes me feel better.
I love spending time by myself my partner is an attention hound if I am not in his vicinity he gets all pittiful and says he feels abandoned … he needs a full time job..I have one so time is precious to me especially alone time..maybe I am selfish I cannot help this part of my nature ..I do not do well without me time.