Dry River Bed © lynette sheppard
Menopause means moist in all the wrong places. You’re dripping on the outside while your skin and tender membranes are desiccating as if they were exposed to a harsh Southwestern sun, 24/7.
We have feedback on our outer skin. We see it crack and peel, feel it itch or flake. And we pour on lotions. By the tubful. All that money we save on monthly feminine supplies? It’s nothing compared to what we have to budget now just to keep a semblance of moisture.
Inside we are dry too. Our natural vaginal moisture disappears. For some of us, it is noticeable in painful sexual intimacy. We buy and use lubricants to regain a healthy sex life. And thankfully, there are many products now mimic natural lubrication (see the Menopause Marketplace for some of our favorites.)
When vaginal dryness doesn’t cause painful intercourse, however, it can still cause health problems. Vaginal atrophy and thinning of the lining may manifest along with dryness. One of our own Venuses was having problems with drainage and recurrent infections. Turns out that sexual intimacy was resulting in microtears in the lining that were then becoming infected. Even though she couldn’t feel that. Using lubrication and taking estrogen intravaginally has alleviated the symptoms.
One of our faithful readers and satellite Venuses wrote me with a brilliant solution of her own. She was having urinary and bladder issues (again, which can be part of this whole post menopausal syndrome). She did not want to avail herself of HRT and was trying to find a more natural alternative.
Evening primrose oil has been used by some women for a variety of Menopause symptoms. This goddess had taken the capsules at one time for general relief of hot flashes and the like, but had to discontinue them because of nosebleeds. (Evening primrose oil can be a blood thinner. Remember, just because it is “natural” doesn’t mean “no side effects.”.)
She wondered about inserting the capsules as a vaginal suppository, where there would be a local effect (relief of dryness) without the systemic effects (blood thinning). Google turned up little information, so she tried it on her own.
And… it worked! No more dryness, relief of urinary symptoms, and reduction of hot flashes. “It’s not perfect,” she tells us. “There is a bit of leaking, so you need some light protection, but all in all, I think it’s fantastic, and I thought you might like to pass it on to others.” I think I’ll give it a try as well.
Another reader shared that she started drinking dong quai tea and lubrication was simply no longer a problem. Another potential remedy to try.
This is what we are all about. Women sharing wisdom – what works and what doesn’t. Our thought processes, experimentations, successes, and failures. Let us know what works for you. And doesn’t. We’ll gather around our virtual kitchen table here and help one another through the worst and best of the Big M. The best journeys are shared.
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I’m heading to the health food store for some dong quai tea.
It’s wonderful when we can share our ideas and what works. This site is a great place of trust and honesty and we need to take advantage of it.
Kat
I’m so happy I found this page. I’ve been experiencing urinary soreness (no UTI) but it took me a year to figure out what it was. This is after visits to urology, obgyn ,primary and RA. doctors . I finally examine myself and realized it was not a urethra problem but a vaginal problem (dryness). I immediately opened a capsule of Vit.E and put the oil on and in. I got some relief. But i want it gone..I read these articles and ordered Even. Primrose and going to try it. I’m post menopause turning 63 this year. This is all new to me. Thank you for your feedback and comments. It is very helpful. Lets hope it works.
Yes, Cathy! Keep us posted! Virtual hugs to you, Lynette
THE CAPSUELS MIGHT NOT LEAK IF YOU TAKE THEM JUST AS YOU GO TO BED…gravity and all…
Great idea, Goodpix. Maybe there are some instances where gravity can be our friend!
Dong Quai didn’t help me but Maca did. Maca, however, also gave me terrible stomach cramps! Let’s see, which do I choose, moisture or a calm stomach? ARGH!
I’ve had the same experiences as the other Sherry. Dong Quai didn’t help with dryness, Maca is the only thing that has helped but I had horrible stomach cramps while taking it. I’m just glad I’m not the only one that had the same reaction to the maca.
I’ve been taking Evening Primrose oil for hot flashes and it does seem to help a little. But oral consumption has done nothing for my vaginal dryness. It’s been a triple whammy – loss of desire, painful because of dryness, and the last time intercourse even caused some bleeding. And that was using the Sex Butter! I think I’ll try the suppository method and see if that helps. Thanks for the suggestion!
Women listen up! You have to do the research. I am like a lab mouse I TRY EVERYTHING before I share! Evening Primrose is the BEST! No chemical vag creams because they can give you cancer in the long run no matter how bio-identical they match our bodies! If they work for you great! Ok you get the primrose capsule poke a tiny hole in it put some on your clean finger stick it up there circle it around work it and put on your outter rose petals yep thats what I call it! Also take one every day IT WORKS NO MORE PAINFUL SEX, DRYNESS,etc. The trick is you keep a capsule in the bathroom on a paper towel hidden if you prefer , use it before you go to bed and in the mornning after you pee get back in bed if your husband likes it in the morning and take control of his member lol he will love you for it. Give it time to work its a fatty acid we all need in our bodies. Hot flashes you don’t want any well give up the caffeine, alcohol, and fatty foods GONE. Hey sorry its real easy. Your body temp. will go back to being normal! Try it for 2 weeks. Make sure you get natural primrose no synthetics anything ending in ide or ate leave it on the shelves! WITH ANY VITAMINS. Good luck
Hello I was just wondering how long do you have to insert the pill to see results
Women listen up! You have to do the research. I am like a lab mouse I TRY EVERYTHING before I share! Evening Primrose is the BEST! No chemical vag creams because they can give you cancer in the long run no matter how bio-identical they match our bodies! If they work for you great! Ok you get the primrose capsule poke a tiny hole in it put some on your clean finger stick it up there circle it around work it and put on your outter rose petals yep thats what I call it! Also take one every day IT WORKS NO MORE PAINFUL SEX, DRYNESS,etc. The trick is you keep a capsule in the bathroom on a paper towel hidden if you prefer , use it before you go to bed and in the mornning after you pee get back in bed if your husband likes it in the morning and take control of his member lol he will love you for it. Give it time to work its a fatty acid we all need in our bodies. Hot flashes you don’t want any well give up the caffeine, alcohol, and fatty foods GONE. Hey sorry its real easy. Your body temp. will go back to being normal! Try it for 2 weeks. Make sure you get natural primrose no synthetics anything ending in ide or ate leave it on the shelves! WITH ANY VITAMINS. Good luck
My dear friend, I used it vaginal and it really help with the hot flashes! I used to take it orally but I had a lot of bruises, but the results vaginaly are 90 %better! Good luck dear.
New Chapter Super critical Omega-7 is very good for vaginal dryness. I also use New Chapter Wholemega Fish Oil along with Vitamin E. I find these products keep my vaginal area very lubricated.
Good to know, thanks Diane.
I am about 1.5 years into menopause, I have been taking evening primrose for about one year. I can feel the difference if I don’t take it. The only symptoms of menopause that I still experienced were the mood swings. So, a friend suggested I use evening primrose topically, pin hole in gel, rubbed into the vaginal area. Also suggested was to use it on the face for help with your cosmetic purposes. So far, so good. It has only been a week. I noticed an immediate relief of mood swing after application to vaginal area. Delia
just got diagnosed with vaginal atrophy after thinking it was everything from yeast to god knows what. now trying ovestin estrogen cream. in the meantime it feels like i’m riding a red hot poker to hell. lol i’m 63, american, living in new zealand. my friend sent me some replens from the states. i’d been naughty and not taken estrogen cream in about a year. it all hit me at once! pain and discomfort. thanks for letting me share…….
So sorry to hear – hope it feels better soon. Believe me – it’s more common than we ever thought. Sheesh!
thanks lynette! after ten solid days of ‘shooting up ‘ estrogen cream it got better, now i’m never going to give it up and my replens! i can’t imagine a woman being silent about this condition. it gets to the point you can’t even walk and feel physically ill. girls get help!
I am allergic to progesterone and strogens. last time i put a estrogen cream it burned my insides so i put ice cubes insde to help. Painful intercourse and no sex for 15 years due to lasting pain when touching that area and after sex, never tried again but itching is terrible, i use jock itching cream which helps somewhat, I wash vaginal area with oil soap and water three times a day to soothe the area.
reading hot romances helps me sometimes, i feel desire then but acting upon it i am afraid the pain will return, so doing nothing.
Oh Elsie, I am so sorry for all you are going through. There is a gentle healing and lubricating salve called Loverslube Personal Lubricant – made by Moonmaid Botanicals. I use it for intimacy, but also for healing and soothing the effects of dryness. All natural herbal salve – love it. Try it for soothing the dryness as well as their Vital V Wild Yam Salve for the vulva – external use for this one. Let us know how it works for you – and good luck, darlin’! Here’s hoping intimacy returns soon. (Also Google holistic MD’s to see what other options might be available from a good practitioner.) Go to MoonmaidBotanicals.com for the salves.
Thanks so much for the suggestion of inserting the evening primrose oil capsules. It worked after only a couple of days. I’m in early menopause at 43 and intercourse was very painful. I tried vagifem but became very irritable. This has been a lifesaver for my health and marriage.
So happy to hear that, Sara. Sometimes it is the simplest things that work the best. Stay cool! Lynette
Yes evening primrose really helps. I got off of Estrace cream ! I just dont feel like taking chemicals which might give us cancer. Also the price is crazy 250 to 350 for a tube. Some insurance dont even cover it. Also take the primrose orally makes your skin beautifulllll its also great moisturizer . Good luck to all you women. A big plus get to working out and drink lots of water you will see a big difference. C Willcutt.
How wonderful to find this blog and all the wonderful natural information here. EPO experiment is underway. I have managed the pause so gracefully with Yoga, Ayurveda and Meditation until the onset of severe intravaginal dryness. I’ve got a wonderful GYN and here’s the thing: the last time I was there, I was faithfully taking EPO. She asked me why I was no longer taking it. Now that’s a big step for Western Medicine. Once you actually MENTION you want some natural options, hopefully you have a great GYN that works WITH you. She even is going to talk with a pharmacist about getting applicators fabricated for women who make their own coconut oil suppositories…same for EPO suppository- I think you’ve got to get the product high enough in the vagina.
Thanks so much for sharing your experience, Lisa. I couldn’t agree more that we need to find trusted, enlightened health care partners. Keep us posted on your experiment!
Lisa
Will you share the name of the Pharmacits that manufacture the applicators for COCONUT OIL? Thank you!!
Evening primrose oil, as a suppository, worked wonders for me with the dryness. I also had burning during intercourse, and it cut down on that as well. It was a little scary to insert the gel capsule…but it was all good. I swear by the stuff now
Hi Ladies,
I came to your site a few months ago. I got the tea mentioned above and I tried the Evening Primrose as a suppository. The EP worked OK, but not as well as I wanted it to. So, I kept looking. Well, I saw an oil mixture for almost $100.00, I did not get it, however, I read the ingredients and so I added to the Evening Primrose vitamin E. Between my husbands ED and my vaginal dryness and pain… so much pain there was nothing happening in our bedroom or anywhere else, it was months long stretches in between because of the pain. So, I went to my GYN and he suggested Osphena and the lubricant Luvena.
Well, as I read the side effects of Osphena I said nope, nope. So, I decided to try cutting the EP and the Vit E capsule open and apply to my vaginal walls/lining and use the Luvena together. Messy but I don’t care as long as it works. The first time after months it was still a little painful. But once we got going all the pain was gone, I was so happy about that. Well, we tried again. We are busy, but since we have somewhat a solution in my mind we need to keep it going…. so it has been a week and I said let’s try again. So, a little while ago we tried again, hardly no pain at all!!! I have to believe that it will only get better and better the more we have intercourse. We have a reason not to let so much time pass between intercourse now. I think it will only get better. I just wanted to pass on the success, The EP 1300 and the Vit E 1000mg was less than 25.00 bucks. You apply only when you are about to have sex. PERFECT!!!!!
Thank you for sharing your story and great recommendations with us, Tanya. Now we all get to benefit from your research. Vaginal dryness can take the joy right out of intimacy – and can put a strain on our relationships. I’m glad you figured out such a simple, albeit slippery, solution. Vitamin E and our vaginal tissue simply love each other – women have used it to repair cervical damage effectively too. Enjoy, Ashley
Hi. I’ve been using vitamin e vaginally for the past several years. It helps with daily comfort but hasn’t helped with sexual pain. Haven’t tried EPO vaginally and am curious if it will be better for my needs. Currently using 800mg of vitamin e – what is the recommended amount of EPO for vaginal application? Thanks!!
Most women I’ve talked with use 1-2 500 mg capsules of evening primrose oil. Start with one and give it time to work. Good luck! Keep us posted.
What helps my dry skin?
Alas, it is different for every woman – some swear by coconut oil, some like jergen’s or other over the counter products. Recently, my hair became dry – I tried commercial products and coconut oil with some success but then tried olive oil – left on for 20 minutes and then shampoo. A miracle. Good luck and keep us posted, Delia.
I have just started using EVO for menopausal vaginal dryness. How often is recommended and many capsules should I be using?
Hi I use paw paw ointment externally as a lubricant. I find the perineal area is where I feel that dryness that needs some lubricant help when I make love. It feels more fragile and less moist. Also. someone commented on overall dry skin. An Ayurvedic doctor I visited recommended black sesame oil as a daily all body rub. I bought a huge bulk tin of organic black sesame and rub it all over each day/ after a shower but often as I go to bed. It really seems to be beneficial for my skin. I did a google and its not surprising as is full of nutrient for skin. In Ayurvedic medicine it is highly regarded treatment to deeply nourish us. I know its not on topic but they also mentioned a warm foot bath before bed and to rub the iol in after as a panacea for sleep difficulties. Its really great/ does help along with my fresh grown camomile flowers in tea
Wonderful info, Kate. Thanks so much for sharing.
Does the capsule dissolve in your vagina ?
It does – can be a little messy, so I’d insert it just before bedtime.
Wow a great resource goddesses thank you
What about the oil instead of capsules, has anyone tried to insert oil?
I bought vitamin E drops and I put some drops inside the petals, it helps me somehow. I don’t have sex anymore and i feel no desire whatsoever for anyone, I am still young, but intercourse is so painful that it reflects in my face and my husband said that if i was not enjoying and having pain he was not going to make me suffer. I was reading about 30 shades of gray, these two were enjoying pain, but I do not have that mentality so i don’t think my husband wants to play that game. I feel ashamed not to be able to have sex and i am allergic to many products…i do not get aroused by anything anyway…i was just trying to save my marriage, but i can see his frustration..we do care for each other but for a middle age man must be frustrating to touch me and I am feeling nothing. Not even kissing arouse me.
I swear that libido does return (though not like it was in our prime). One of our goddesses was having such a difficult time and her husband, like yours, was having a hard time as well. They went to see a therapist who recommended that once a week, they just show up naked with a smile. They could cuddle or stroke one another. This helped with closeness and intimacy and after two years, her libido returned. It sounds like you might need more than vitamin E drops if intercourse is still painful. Put vaginal dryness in the search box on the blog Menopause Goddess Blog – there are a lot of entries with different remedies you might wish to try. Also, I’ll be posting about a new movie that comes out in DVD on 8/22 called Love, Sweat and Tears that addresses this and other symptoms with products that might help. Good luck and keep us posted – believe me, we know how hard it is.
Must I put an Evening Primrose Capsule every evening in even if we don’t have sex. I am going to try to put a hole in the capsule an put the oil on my clean vinger just as CW says. Me and my husband try but it was so sore their where blood afterwards. I really need to try something that would work.
I read that we should get 3 X 1000mg EP in on a day.
Johanna
I’m with C.W.! I’ve used a few drops of the oil from a vitamin e capsule, and rotated with the oil from a primrose capsule, inserted every other night and have been totally amazed about how plump all the tissues have become. Making love used to be horribly painful, and now it’s back to being pleasant! I can’t believe I went through such pain for 3 years, with the estradiol cream not quite cutting it. I was also having lots of bladder infections, and inserting a probiotic every other night, and taking an enteric coated one so the probiotic isn’t killed by the stomach acid has helped! What a relief! Back to being in the game!!!
Best wishes!