Last week, I talked about 5 things I hate about aging. As promised, here’s the other side of that currency.
#1. I don’t fret about how I look.
Let’s face it – at some point, all the fixin’ up in the world still yields decreased dividends. Like my own personal Wall Street.
Don’t get me wrong – I’m not letting myself go. I don’t wish my personal stock market to do a Lehman Brothers faceplant. I believe in some minimal maintenance. (okay not thirty something-type minimal. Minimal when you are in your fifties would be maximal at an earlier time of life.)
Still, it’s a great relief to realize that this is as good as it gets, appearance wise. So after that necessary minimal maintenance I’m not letting myself go; just allowing myself to be. And breathing, lots of breathing.
#2. I don’t try to please everyone.
Or sometimes anyone. I do try to please me. I used to be last on my list. These days, I usually am in the top three. Sometimes, I’m even at numero uno. Yep, definitely making progress.
And here’s a major benefit to all who have to deal with me: when I please my self, I’m actually more pleasing to be around. Well, duh!!! Hey all you daughters and goddesses-in-training out there, take note. Do not wait until you are my age to learn this. It’s so freaking obvious, at least from my present vantage point.
#3. I’m comfortable in my baggy dry skin.
Oh yeah, I have to admit that it’s a little alarming when I inadvertently photograph my neck wattle while fooling with my iPhone camera. But hey, that’s why the little trash can icon was created. And I make quick use of it in those unfortunate circumstances. (I guarantee you that you’ll NEVER see one of those photos on iPhone Diva…or anywhere else. Just sayin’…)
Besides, there’s moisturizers, lotions, emollients, sunscreens, and wrinkle creams galore spread out before me like a giant oil-rich smorgasbord at just about every retail facility I frequent. So no problem. I may not look great, but I won’t desiccate completely.
The point is that I love being a middle aged Menopause Goddess. I never felt so comfortable being, well..me.. at any other age. (When in my twenties, thirties, and even early forties by the way, I was perfect on the outside and just didn’t know it. Daughters and goddesses-in-training, take another note. You are perfect, you are gorgeous, don’t waste this time worrying about how you look!)
And now that I’m less concerned about how I look or appear externally, I place much more attention on who I am becoming internally. And I gotta say that I’m beginning to like her, the fifty-something version of Lynette. Still a work in progress but we’re definitely onto something here.
#4. I waste time without feeling guilty
Actually, I don’t consider unstructured time “wasted” time anymore. Time spent contemplating, daydreaming, reading (I do lots of reading which I can justify as being absolutely necessary for any writer, but I love it too much to consider it prep or work of any kind.), wandering through the woods or up the road, staring out the windows at clouds, birds, sky, nothing; – all of these are beginning to seem like the absolute best use of time imaginable. And the loss of the guilt? I’m not accomplishing or getting things done or fill-in-the-blank here. So what? This is how this menopausal woman is working toward Goddess. I DO enough – time to BE as well.
#5. I try new things without fear of failure.
Here’s the great and glorious truth that I have learned. The failure police won’t come after me if I mess up. So what’s holding me back? Nothing. I don’t mind looking foolish (see #1 again.)
So I’m happy to jump in to new pursuits with both feet (carefully if it is truly physical – I don’t want to break.) Otherwise the sky is the limit – new photo technology, new art forms, dance, learning a language, and more.
So I suck. So what? I’ll get better eventually. The important things are that I’m branching out and experimenting, doing things I never thought I’d try, exercising my mind and stimulating my creative juices. And I am having a buttload of fun.
So yes, I love these five things about aging. I’m sure there will be more to love in the coming years. How about you all, goddesses? What do you like about growing older? Let us know right here in the comments. For now, I’m off to do finish reading Steven Tyler’s autobiography “Does The Noise In My Head Bother You?”. Purely for research purposes…not!
I turned 60 in March. Brad and I went to Maui for a week of whale watching to kick things off. Then my Mom died and we flew home, and back to Michigan for the memorial events. In this same month, our Tahoe house finally sold and we had to move our things. And on the last day of the month, Brad had a second heart ablation procedure and our Tahoe escrow closed. In April, when I had time to catch my breath, I realized that my birthday month had passed. Surprise! It wasn’t all about me! Older and wiser, maybe….
One of the best things I love about this stage in life is that I find it is easy to not get upset about things that really don’t matter in the long run. Will the outcome of this “crisis” really matter next year? No? Then breathe deep, look for a solution, and let it go.
well, there is no turning back, we are all aging, so find what make you feel good now and enough!!! thanks lynette for all the kokua
5 things I love about aging? I don’t have to ask permission from anyone; I can buy whatever I need to get; I don’t ever have to worry about getting pregnant again or getting an STD; I get to be in charge of any situation I’m in; I’ve found my voice and feel comfortable in my (somewhat sagging) skin; no more zits; and I can dance when the spirit moves me 🙂
Oh Lynette…I have just added a gazillian smile wrinkles reading this. And enjoying every moment of it. Great wisdom…will get back to you with my list! Enjoy this excerpt from poem ‘Weathering’ by Fleur Adcock….
‘now that I am in love
with a place that doesn’t care
how I look and if I am happy,
happy is how I look and that’s all.
I certainly need to do more of #5 because I’m really the only one getting in my way.
I sent your blog to a friends daughter who is in her 20’s she is a truely beauitiful young woman just graduated collage and has no confidence and thinks she needs to have all the answers to everything .. sound familiar?I a rooting for her to get her 50 brain early and be spectacular now …