The Best Change Brought by Menopause

dandelion swirl © lynette sheppard

“I’m sorry about your weight,” said Marcia, the checker at my local Safeway.
“Wha… what?” I stammered, wondering if I’d worn pants that showed the two extra pounds I’d regained over my HCG diet weight.
“I know it took a long time, but her credit card wasn’t working and…”
I burst out laughing. “Oh, you’re sorry for the wait! If you knew what I heard…. I wanted to say that you couldn’t possibly be as sorry as I am… I’ve been practicing avoidance maneuvers to get around the scale in the bathroom.”
Marcia is a woman of Menopause Goddess persuasion and began to laugh, too.
“Don’t even go there,” she giggled. “I’m way ahead of you.”

Just when I was beginning to feel that I’d gotten a pretty good handle on the mental changes that have alternated between distressing and hilarious, I now find that my ability to process information is on the blink.

I’ve been taking my acetyl-l-carnitine religiously and my memory has been pretty good (for my age.) And I am definitely less spacy – the brain fog has  mostly cleared leaving just a few misty spots. I even caught a problem in a legal document recently that saved us a lot of time and trouble.

So while I wasn’t all the way to smug about my mental faculties, I felt like I could hold my head up pretty high.

Until today. When I had trouble understanding words in context in my native tongue.

I do think I have discovered the best thing about Menopause, though. It’s not the lack of monthly cycles (although that’s pretty good.) It’s not the transition to elder (with its assumption of wisdom, although that’s pretty good, too.) It’s not even the feeling of comfort in my loosening skin. (Although that’s great…just sayin’…)

Nope. The very best thing about Menopause is that I will be kept laughing for the rest of my life. Because what else can a Menopause Goddess do when confronted with the shifting sands of time? It is just so freaking funny. My sense of humor is in better shape than ever. Thank heavens something is!

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5 Responses to The Best Change Brought by Menopause

  1. Cynthia August 27, 2011 at 6:42 pm #

    The most important change for me is having left the stresses of career and child rearing behind and having the time (and consciousness) to seek my bliss and love the life I’ve created. Also, being comfortable in my own skin and not worrying so much about how others see me is a great gift. No decisions are made based on other people’s expectations, anymore. Wooo-hoooo!

  2. Theresa August 27, 2011 at 8:20 pm #

    Tolerance – I love this new level of tolerance. Or, perhaps I am just too tired to carry angst any more. I don’t know what changed but honestly, I feel like I can just let so much more slide off my shoulders.

  3. Grace InAZ September 10, 2011 at 3:51 pm #

    You are right on in your observations! I am wondering if I could ask you to be a guest blogger on my new blog Growing Old With Grace at . I don’t know how that works, but it seems your writing would fit well with what I am trying to accomplish. You can contact me at if you are interested. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and advice!

  4. kaylrz January 18, 2016 at 10:39 am #

    I wish I could think it (mental-pause) was funny, but I’m just not there right now.

  5. LynetteSh February 7, 2016 at 2:20 pm #

    Dear Kaylrz, I so empathize – it wasn’t funny until it was. What helped was knowing that it is temporary and we are not alone. Hang in there – I always say that menopause will set you free – but it will really mess you up first. Virtual hugs, Lynette

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