© Lynette Sheppard
A while back, I was talking with a physician of midlife age, commiserating about the myriad changes wrought upon us during the Change. I jokingly said, “It’s like our very DNA has changed.” She looked me straight in the eyes and said seriously, “It has! I’m absolutely convinced of it.”
Whether that is actually true or not, it sure feels true! We sometimes focus on the difficult and alarming changes, for good reason. We want help and we want it now. But when the change tornado eases off to a gentle breeze, we find that there are positive changes.
Here’s a partial list of changes I went through separated into negative, so-so, and positive categories.
Negative changes:
Hot flashes
Vaginal dryness
Brain fog
Loss of libido
Thinning hair
Anxiety and night terrors
Weight gain
I missed the mood swings and emotional changes, thankful for that. And thankful that the negative changes were temporary and/or treatable. Whew.
So-so changes
Switched from evening person to morning person
Bodacious tatas ( messed up my wardrobe AND my golf swing)
Invisibility (weird but useful, even desirable, at times.)
Positive changes
Unafraid to try new things (surfing, writing fiction, gardening)
Surge in creativity
Comfortable in my own skin
More accepting of myself and others
Self-care has become a priority
We goddesses would love to hear about the changes you have experienced during this transition. Add them in the comments (which won’t appear until we approve them – because, you know, spammers) or send them directly to lynette@9points.com. And if you need more info about any manifestation of the change, just put it in the Search box here on the blog and all posts related to that will pop up.
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“bodacious tatas” lol
Even though I’m in perimenopause, I have found a sense of shifting into a more responsible person. It’s been a time when I can re-calibrate and figure out what I really should and shouldn’t be eating.
Oh yes, we noticed that over the course of our perimenopause. Our first meetings the fridge was filled with chocolate and wine! Nothing wrong with either of those but the quantities decreased over the course of our annual meetings and more healthy foods just naturally seemed to be what we wanted.
All of the above, including hair growing in places I never had hair before (chin hairs anyone?) but on the plus side I shave my armpits & legs less often (or not at all!)
The invisibility was a surprise. Still working on solving the anxiety / night terrors. Acupuncture was a huge help in dealing with many of the physical issues.
I care less about what other people say or think about me, less willing to ‘waste’ time especially on trying to make relationships work that aren’t working or to go along to keep others ‘happy.’ Gets me in trouble sometimes, but good trouble.
I love to read about the positive changes, and am especially interested in the increase in creativity and compassion with oneself and others. Can you recommend any books, podcasts, or other resources that talk about these changes in menopause?
I’m not sure if anyone else has experienced wild indigestion and acid reflux, it hit me out of nowhere, the thinning hair has been happening, I’ve used a product called May 11 hair oil, it is amazing!! I’ve never cared much about what anyone else thinks, but I also have become much more intentional with the choices I make!!
It has been a shock to the system, mentally, physically and emotionally. I had a full abdominal hysterectomy – from & incl. cervix and up removed, resulting in instant full blown menopause. I am 37, after years of painful struggles with endometriosis, this was my last option to a life without pain. Still in recovery after the surgery… and I have nightmares of what to expect from sexual intimacy. It is really hard to find people openly sharing their experiences… as though it is shameful. Any advice for a newby to menopause…please!
Hi Anilda, Yes, it can really be a shock, especially after a hysterectomy. There is an abundance of info and sharing on the Menopause Goddess Blog – just put the issue in the Search box and it will bring up every post about that from the last 15 years. eg vaginal dryness, sexual health, hot flashes, you name it. Also, I recommend the website Hystersisters.com as another resource that can be of great help. Good luck – keep us posted! You are not alone!